grudge

n. : a feeling of ill will or resentment
v. : to give or permit with reluctance

i wonder how long you can hold a grudge against someone. but then i guess that depends on how terribly they treated you. i admit to holding many grudges. and today i've seen grudges that were born years ago, that i still hold inside me today. i also discovered my ability to let go of some as well. to just forget it, and remember that what's in the past is where it is. the past. why continue to let that get to you?

and then there's the time when you grudge through life when times are rough. and you sorta just deal with life in the most negative way possible. it's just felt like a waste of time, in all honesty.

i know i'm human. therefore, i'm far from perfect. i do hold grudges that i may keep with me for years. i also tend to be pessimistic. but if i try hard enough, i believe i can change for the better.
takes time.