i never looked forward to senior year. not really. i was never as excited as everyone else to be the one of the upperclassmen. to, in some strange possible way, be supposedly looked up to by the little ones. whenever i look at all of the other senior classes in the past, they seemed so.. mature. everything was easy for them.
i still don't feel like a senior.
it wasn't easy for me this year.
it wasn't typical either.
it wasn't the senior year people told me it would be. i'm not excited to graduate. i'm not excited for college, not really. i'm not nostalgic or particularly frustrated with being treated like children. i do want to leave certain people behind, but i also want to hold on to those who took care of me and made me feel safe. it's different...
haha, but i do feel very much like a small, immature high schooler for writing this.
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