there are moments when life seems to hurt you in ways you never thought possible. there are mornings when you feel as though you just don't have the strength to get out of bed and face the terrible life you seem to be living. there are nights when you simply feel like crying yourself to sleep and wish only to wake up with a different reality. then there are the times when you look back at all of the mistakes you made at one point or another in your past and just laugh. sometimes that laughter takes only a few seconds, other times it may take months.
more recently, i've found myself looking back at the stupid mistakes i made and can't help but smile. i always feared the regret i would hold on to if i were to make any stupid mistakes. but with life being this good, there really is no need to regret. without the mistakes i've made and lessons i've learned, i would not be where i am today. i'd still be that naive, little girl searching for some kind of wisdom to make me more mature and give me a better outlook on life. when in reality, that shallow search for it is what held me back and forced me to keep that immaturity. i hid my foolish self behind what seemed to pass off as thoughtful prose.
though things may not necessarily be ideal, i'm pretty satisfied with life. i kinda like who i am. i'm living in the moment as best as i can.
the now is too good to spend it dwelling in the past.