I'm in one of those moods. Where you wake up not feeling so great, but you try to just ignore it. And you just try to get through the day and your mind just keeps wandering. You think about the people who were once so close but managed to walk away from your life. And then names of people who are still in your life keep popping up, but in the back of your mind you know that you're losing them too. You've already felt a part of you pushing them away and you're physically and mentally just too tired to make an effort to keep them close.
And throughout the day, little things that normally wouldn't bother you just keep pestering you. You're suddenly very aware of all of your flaws. Insecurities about the future make everything worse. And that voice in your head telling you that you don't even have a right to feeling this way doesn't help. So by the end of it all, you just feel like dirt.
Yeah.. one of those moods.
Tomorrow will be better though.
Bright side: I finally went running again, and my room is the cleanest it's been in months, potentially even years.